Before you start with your self-improvement journey, you must find your “WHY” If your “why” does not you affect emotionally (we like to say if it doesn’t make you cry) then it may not be a big enough reason to motivate you to create the better you. Make your WHY genuinely heartfelt and large enough so that it ignites passion and intense emotion behind your dreams. These emotions will inspire urgent need in you for self-improvement.
Here are the 10 ways which will help you to become more confident, with more self-esteem, with more energy and positivism
You can’t do all of them at the same time. Start with the easiest one and when you achieve it (become better in this field) start with another and so on. Don’t stop until you finished your self-improvement journey and you are satisfied with the results of better you.
#1. Commit to your self-improvement and personal growth
Your journey for self-improvement starts with your commitment to yourself. You must start with this one.
Commit to yourself that you will work on your self-improvement every day.
Stay in front of the mirror put your right hand on the heart and looking in yourself say what you want to be to the end of some period. For example, you can say:
I (your name) commit that no matter what I will work on my self-improvement until …..
It maybe will look ridiculous in the beginning, but you will see how your confidence will rise every day. No one except you is responsible for your self-improvement. Read this article and pick one task which is the best to start with according to you. Practice it every day starting with your long journey for personal growth. Don’t expect immediate results. Stick with your wish for self-improvement, and you can see positive changes in your life and yourself
Remember You are the only person who can start your personal growth. Create the strategy, work on it every day and take your commitment seriously.
#2. Take responsibility for all your actions, wins and failures
You must take responsibility for all your actions, wins and failures. You must take time and found your victories and mistakes and analyze them. Deeply in yourself look for the reasons for your errors. Why you react in that way, what motivated you, how you felt at that moment. Write on paper your thoughts and feelings. Find them and create the plan for their improvements. How will you react the next time, what will you change in your actions and attitude, what will you feel when you will repair your mistake and transform it in a win.
Learn from your mistakes and failures, but learn from your wins too.
Analyze your wins and find the way to improve them.
Taking responsibilities for your actions will increase your conses.
With every new victory, you will increase your self-esteem and your confidence.
Two years ago, I heard about a therapist in Hawaii Dr. Ihaleakala Hew Len who cured a complete ward of criminally insane patients – without ever seeing any of them. The psychologist would study an inmate’s chart and then look within himself to see how he created that person’s illness. As he improved himself, the patient improved.
The therapist had used a Hawaiian healing process called ho’oponopono. According to Dr. Len total responsibility for your life means that everything in your life – simply because it is in your life – is your responsibility. In a literal sense the entire world is your creation.
Dr. Len suggests a four-stage process for this ho’oponopono work. Whenever a place for healing presents itself in your life, open to the place where the hurt resides within you. After identifying this place, with as much feeling as you can, say the below four statements:
- I love you.
- I’m sorry.
- Please forgive me.
- Thank you.
#3.Focus on your words
Your words and thoughts are such powerful things and can directly affect every aspect in our lives. If held in a positive context they can provide hope and empowerment. If used in a negative aspect they can steal and destroy the things we value so much in our lives. I realized that in my life I had nothing that resembled a success. Later I found it was because my vocabulary was riddled with regular use of negative words that resulted in negative thoughts or vise versa. I had created a very bad habit that needed to be corrected. This was not something I could do in a day or two or even in a couple of weeks. It took practice, a conscious effort over some time. This was a real challenge however once I changed my vocabulary I started to see little sparks of positivism in my life.
“Words have the power to both destroy and heal. When words are both true and kind, they can change our world.”― The Buddha
Words we say to others are very powerful but what about the Self-Talk?
– These are the words we use that affect our moods and everything in our day. We are not the only ones affected; it affects others in our lives. (Our families, our peers and even co-workers).
My Challenge To You – Remove the Following Vocabulary in your journey for Self Improvement
1. Can’t – The use of this word is primarily why many hopes and dreams are never achieved or seen. The elimination of this word completely will positively change your life in so many ways.
2. But – “But” negates whatever statement that precedes it. “I want to quit my job but……. Your mind does not focus on quitting your job and only sees the income, hard work and time needed to achieve the goal of quitting your job. Replace “but” with “And.”
3. Should – Whenever you use the word “should” generally creates a sense of guilt. “I should go swimming,” makes you feel guilty for not swimming. Replace “should” word with “choose,” as in, “I choose to go swimming, or I choose not to go swimming Today.”
4. Maybe – This word indicates indecision, doubt, or uncertainty as to a course of action. For example, in “Maybe I’d better wait to …” replace “Maybe” with “I will” or “I will not.” “I will” or “I will not” emits feelings of confidence, sounds like the more positive words and resolve what are so important to our well-being.
5. Soon or Later – Both are non-committal and indefinite references to time. Replace these words with a definite time and date. Imagine what could happen to your integrity and deadlines when these words are used frequently. When you use I’m going to do something “soon” or “later,” no one can determine when whatever it is will get done.
6. Someday – Someday, is the same as soon or later, when it is used, it shows the lack of commitment and is much too indefinite. Replace “someday” with a specific time and date.
7. Never – This word is absolute in the negative context. Replace the word “never” with a non-absolute term
8. Won’t – The word “won’t” implies reluctance, an unwillingness, or closed-mindedness, and it is quite harmful because like others negative absolute terms it decreases our self-confidence and closes the doors to our self-improvement
9. If – This is a small word that carries great doubts and puts huge limitations on our belief system, and when used often, it decreases our confidence and intended actions, which are necessary for any success.
10. Try or (I’ll Try) y) – Replace “I’ll try” with “I’ll do my best” or “I will.”
These words must be given serious thought before we use them in our “self talk” or in the conversations we have with others. Because words hold so much power they can influence the way people view us, our business and our opinions of ourselves as well as what we
#4. Know your priority goals for any day
Every night before you go to sleep write your goals for the next day. When you wake up read and focus on them. You’ll be more ready and energized to fulfill them because of a specific focus. Do not allow anything to distract you until those targets or goals are accomplished. This will help you feel better every day and, it will boost your energy for anything else you want to finish that day because you will be proud of fulfilling the goals and keeping your word with yourself. You will find the journey for self-improvement excited and you will feel better every day.
I practice this every day, and this helps me lot in everyday to-do tasks. I write every task I plan to finish the next day and checked one by one as I finished it or at the and of the day. Don’t overload yourself with so many jobs. Write only the most important ones for the next day – the ones you plan to finish.
If you can’t finish them for some reasons, write them again for the following day. But be careful with this and take care this to not become your habit.
#5. Stop comparing yourself with the others
You must know that you are unique. No one is like you, and you can’t be as the others. Your success is maybe more significant than the others but if you always compare yourself and your life to other people and their lives you will develop destructive habits and a lot of negative feelings.
How to stop comparing your job, car, house, relationships with others? How to control yourself when these thoughts come to you?
Here are some tips you can use to stop comparing yourself to others and improve your self-development.
Focus on your achievements. Compare yourself with yourself and try to better and better every day
Don’t be jealous of your friend’s or neighbor’s car, house, job…
Instead, think about you and how you can improve yourself. It is tough to think positively about you and looking for ways to improve yourself while you don’t have anything. But according to law od attraction you attract only that you think about. If you compare yourself with rich and successful people according to that law, you will attract poverty because you see yourself as pour.
#6. Educate yourself
There are a lot of self-improvement books on the market.
For me, Wallace D. Wattles, Napoleon Hill, Og Mandino, and Joseph Murphy are the best. I have read almost all their books several times. But this is my opinion. For you maybe other authors will be better. So try and find some inspiration books which will motivate you and help you achieve all your goals.
Don’t read the books automatically. There are a lot of exercises in these books. Try to practice them.
Educate and improve yourself in your profession continually too.
Do you know which are the secrets to success according to T. Harv Eker?
1. Learn something
2. Do it
3. Learn more about it
4. Do it as an improvement
One thing we always can count on is change. Life is predictable in that nothing stays the same. It is our mission to try to keep the “train on the track” so that things keep changing in a positive way that makes things better for those who we care about.
If you need additional help, you can join some courses for self-improvement. This one helps me a lot
You could set some time aside to meditate on them, or alternatively, you could write on a journey to keep a record of how you feel.
- What do I really want? Just for myself.
- What has to happen in order to create change?
- What steps of inspired action am I willing to take?
- How much pain will I experience if I don’t change?
- How can I be of service?
Once you’ve written down how you feel, make sure you check back in with yourself on a regular basis to make sure you’re taking action.
If you need help
#7. Stop worrying about everything and take actions
One of my favorite quotes is courtesy of Craig Ballantyne, editor of Early to Rise.
We all go through challenging times and I urge you to not be paralyzed by anxiety and worry. Worrying about a problem does not do anything to solve it or make things better. Everyone has bad days, weeks, months. Life is not always great.
Figure out a plan of action and take the first step.
Take ACTION to Supercharge Your Success.
“When you get into a tight place, and everything goes against you, till it seems as though you could not hang on a minute longer, never give up then, for that is just the place and the time that the tide will turn.” Harriet Beecher Stowe
Here are some tips which will help you when you will have some of these days, weeks, months.
Keep the gratitude journal
I mentioned above that one of my favorite authors is Wallace D. Wattles. In his book The Science of Getting Rich he stated
“The grateful mind is constantly fixed upon the best; therefore it tends to become the best; it takes the form or character of the best, and will receive the best.
Also, faith is born of gratitude. The grateful mind continually expects good things, and expectation becomes faith. The reaction of gratitude upon one’s own mind produces faith, and every outgoing wave of grateful thanksgiving increases faith.
It is necessary, then, to cultivate the habit of being grateful for every good thing that comes to you; and to give thanks continuously.
And because all things have contributed to your advancement, you should include all things in your gratitude.”
I keep the gratitude journal for years. When you write in it involve your feelings. Imagine the excitement you had at the moment when you think about the gratitude. If you only put the staff on the list without emotion, you will fail with this task. Also, you can’t think about gratitude once a week and forget about them the rest of the time. You have to be grateful every day and think about it continuously. What have you been grateful for?
You can be grateful for everything you have in your life
You can be grateful for every success, every small or significant action, every new friend, every finished task or to-do job,
Also, you can be grateful for your home, your family, the food you, the water you drink, your health, sight, speech,…
Focus on “to-do things to improve the situation” rather than on “why this happened to me.”
Ask yourself what can you do to improve the situation. If you spend time thinking about your bad luck, you will be depressed and without motivation for self-improvement.
By asking yourself a question
How can I improve this situation?
Where can I start from?
What steps and actions can I take?
You are looking for the answer on how to improve your life.
And with the action, you work on solving the problem and gain more confidence and self-improvement.
#8. Overcome your fears
Having fear is something which is normal for everyone. It can keep you safe by warning you to potentially dangerous situations. However, they become a problem when they affect your functioning. In that cases may experience intense nervousness or anxiety.
Irrational fears are dangerous and can ruin your self-confidence and inner power. Notice how much they change your functioning and your life. Ask yourself Do your fears keep you from moving forward with what you want in your life?
You have to take immediate action if
Your fear causes intense panic or anxiety
You know that your fear is not reasonable and rational.
You fear to make you avoid specific situations or places
The fears have persisted more than a six months.
Here are some tips on how you can help yourself
Face your fear
Don’t avoid situations that scare you. Avoiding these situations, you will stop doing things you need or want to do. Test out if the case is always as bad as you expect. Work out to manage your fears You can overcome your fears by exposing yourself to them.
Work more on yourself. Keep a diary and write down when fear happen, how, what were your feelings? Read it from time to time and find your trigger
Learn some relaxation techniques like breathe deeply or imagine yourself in a peaceful place, yoga, massage or meditation. Relaxation techniques can help you with the physical feelings, mental feelings of fear.
If you need additional help
#9. Avoid Toxic People
You must know who are toxic people and then start with distance yourself from them. If you don’t know this, you can’t separate toxic people from those who are difficult or who annoy you. These are ten types of toxic people. Stay away from them no matter what and try at all costs not to become one of them.
1. The Gossip
“Great minds discuss ideas, average ones discuss events, and small minds discuss people.” – Eleanor Roosevelt
This kind of people derives pleasure from other’s misfortunes.
Talking and learning from interesting people is much better than wasting your time listening and speaking about the misfortune of others. If Gossip becomes your habit makes you will hurt other people, and you will feel gross.
2. The Temperamental
This kind of people has no control over their reactions and emotions. They will blame you that you’re the one causing their malaise. This makes you feel bad for them. Avoid them at all costs.
3. The Victim
It is hard to recognize this kind of people because you initially empathize with their suffering. They want to be seen as a victim all the time and don’t want to improve their self or learn and practice something new. Because they want to stay as victims all the time you will realize that they take your energy and motivation. You will never learn something from them or be motivated in their presence.
4. The Self-Absorbed
Around Self-absorbed people, you will start to feel completely alone. This happens because there is not a real connection between them and anyone else. You’re only a tool used to build their self-confidence.
5. The Envious
To envious people are always jealous of anything and anyone. Nothing is right for them. They don’t derive any satisfaction even when something great happens to them. No one can be the best in everything, and typically there are the better people around us. But we can’t trivialize our accomplishments. Your motivation for self-improvement will decrise. That is why is dangerous spending too much time with this kind of people.
6. The Manipulator
This kind of people treat you as a friend, but they suck energy and time out of your life. They know everything about you, what makes you sad or happy and use it as part of a hidden agenda. In your relationships with them, you will see after some period that they little or no giving you something but all the time take something from you.
7. The Dementor
This is a very negative person who can wake the worst feelings in the others. This kind of people are always pessimists, and they can inject concern and fear into the most common situations
8. The Twisted
This kind of people feels satisfaction from the misery and pain of others. They are with you only to hurt you, to get something from you or to make you feel bad. You can spot their intentions immediately, and you can get them faster out of your life
9. The Judgmental
This kind of people tells you precisely what is and isn’t great. They have a way of making you feel terrible about the thing you’re most passionate about. They look down on others because they are not interested in learning from them. You will never be an intense, expressive person around them, so it is best for you to avoid them
10. The Arrogant
This kind of people sees everything you do as a personal challenge. Arrogance always masks significant insecurities. Arrogant people have more cognitive problems more disagreeable and tend to be lower performers, than the average person. They are a waste of your time. Spending time with them will decrease your self-improvement
Now you know who are toxic people. Avoid them and distance from them emotionally. They will decrease your self-confidence, your motivation, and your energy.
Read more => Smart Tips for Dealing with Toxic People
#10. Activities which will help you a lot in your journey for self-improvement
Here is the list of 30 activities which will help you in your journey for self-improvement. Practice them in your life. You can’t practice all of them but try as more as you can. They will increase your self-confidence and your inner power.
1. Read a book every day.
2. Learn a new language.
3. Pick up a new hobby.
4. Take up a new course.
5. Create an inspirational room.
6. Level up your skills.
7. Wake up early.
8. Have a weekly exercise routine.
9. Get out of your comfort zone.
10. Acknowledge your flaws.
11. Get into action.
12. Learn from people who inspire you.
13. Quit a bad habit.
14. Cultivate a new habit.
15. Learn to deal with difficult people.
16. Learn from your friends.
17. Start a journal.
18. Get a mentor or coach.
19. Don’t waste most of your time on chat programs.
20. Learn chess (or any strategy game).
21. Stop watching TV.
22. Start a 30-day challenge.
24. Befriend top people in their fields.
25. Let go of the past.
26. Start a business venture.
27. Show kindness to the people around you.
28. Take a break.
29. Read at least 1 self-improvement article a day.
30. Be positive and smile the most of the time
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